Inside us we have a horse (Gurdjieff)

(Gurdjieff, a spiritual master, is an absolute pearl! And an absolute genius. He makes me laugh as he laughs at me. I laugh at me as he laughs at you. It's such a big laugh. Give it a try, it's just an example below...) Inside us we have a horse; it obeys orders from outside. And our mind is too weak to do anything inside. Even if the mind gives the order to stop, nothing will stop inside. We educate nothing but our mind. We know how to behave with such and such. “Goodbye.” “How do you do?” But it is only the driver who knows this. Sitting on his box he has read about it. But the horse has no education whatever. It has not even been taught the alphabet, it knows no languages, it never went to school. The horse was also capable of being taught, but we forgot all about it… And so it grew up a neglected orphan. It only knows two words: right and left. What I said about inner change refers only to the need of change in the horse. If the horse changes, we can change externally. If the horse does not change, everything will remain the same, no matter how long we study. It is easy to decide to change sitting quietly in your room. But as soon as you meet someone, the horse kicks. Inside us we have a horse.

The horse must change.

If anyone thinks that self-study will help and he will be able to change, he is greatly mistaken. Even if he reads all the books, studies for a hundred years, masters all knowledge, all mysteries – nothing will come of it.Because all this knowledge will belong to the driver. And he, even if he knows, cannot drag the cart without the horse – it is too heavy.

First of all you must realize that you are not you. Be sure of that, believe me. You are the horse, and if you wish to start working, the horse must be taught a language in which you can talk to it, tell it what you know and prove to it the necessity of, say, changing its disposition. If you can succeed in this, then with your help, the horse too will begin to learn.

But change is possible only inside.

As to the cart, its existence was completely forgotten. Yet it is also a part, and an important part, of the team. It has its own life, which is the basis of our life. It has its own psychology. It also thinks, is hungry, has desires, and takes part in the common work. It too should have been educated, sent to school, but neither the parents nor anyone else cared. Only the driver was taught. He knows languages, knows where such and such a street is. But he cannot drive there  alone…

Some machines… can still be mended. But this requires a long time, for some of the parts are too damaged… Quite possibly all those who sit here wish and can wish only with one part of themselves. Again it is only with the driver, for he has read something, heard something. He has many fan­tasies; he even flies to the moon in his dreams.

Those who think that they can do something with themselves are greatly mistaken. To change something within is very difficult. What you know, it is the driver who knows it. All your knowledge is just manipulations.

Real change is a very difficult thing, more difficult than finding several hundred thousand dollars in the street.

Question: How to begin inner change?

Answer: You should begin to teach the horse a new language, prepare it for the desire to change.

The cart and the horse are connected. The horse and the driver are also connected by the reins. The horse knows two words—right and left. At times the driver cannot give orders to the horse because our reins have the capacity now to thicken, now to become more thin. They are not made of leather. When our reins become more thin, the driver cannot control the horse. The horse knows only the language of the reins. No matter how much the driver shouts, "Please, right," the horse does not budge. If he pulls, it understands. Perhaps the horse knows some language, but not the one the driver knows. Maybe it is Arabic.

The same situation exists between the horse and the cart;, with the shafts. This requires another explanation. We have something like magnetism in us. It consists not only of one substance but of several. It is an important part of us. It is formed when the machine is working.

Let us examine... the first corresponds to the shafts, the second to the reins, the third to the substance which permits the driver to hear the passenger. You know that sound cannot travel in vacuum; there must be some substance there.

We must understand the difference between a casual passenger and the master of the cart. "I" is the master, if we have an "I." If we have not, there is always someone sitting in the cart and giving orders to the driver. Between the passenger and the driver there is a substance which allows the driver to hear.      

Whether these substances are there or not depends on many accidental things. It may be absent. If the substance has accumulated, the passenger can give orders to the driver, but the driver cannot order the horse, and so on. At times you can, at others you cannot, it depends on the amount of substance there is. Tomorrow you can, today you cannot. This substance is the result of many things.

One of these substances is formed when we suffer. We suffer whenever we are not mechanically quiet. There are different kinds of suffering. For instance, I want to tell you something, but I feel it is best to say nothing. One side wants to tell, the other wants to keep silent. The struggle produces a substance. Gradually this substance collects in a certain place...